I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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