i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
how does that bad decision feel?
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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