I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
