I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
