so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
where are my pants?
in the oven.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
do nipples grow back?
Randomize