I just cut my nipple shaving
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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