Are we in a gay sports bar?
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
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