Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Randomize
