omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
