There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Randomize
