Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
