i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
