So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Randomize
