he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Randomize