he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
