I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Randomize
