Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Randomize
