Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
