That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize