Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Randomize