I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
You smell like a Billy Joel song
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
Sorry about my life...
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
Shame - the story of my life.
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