She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
We need to get me chipped asap
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
