at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
