...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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