the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Randomize
