friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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