I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
