woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Randomize