Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Randomize
