Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize