Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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