My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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