My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
