is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
apparently the secret to your success is patron
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize
