Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
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