Where did you get a picture of my penis
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Ladies don't puke and tell
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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