Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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