Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
