i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
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