Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
We don't watch enough power rangers
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
