I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Randomize
