I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Never underestimate the power of titties
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