With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize