Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
my mouth tastes like poor choices
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
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