oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
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