i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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