you're like a bully in the Christmas story
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Randomize
