Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
