Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize