My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
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