32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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