so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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